UPDATED 1/3: Final copy of essay is due on turnitin.com by midnight on Thursday, 1/7 (in other words, once it is 12:00AM Friday, 11/8, the essay is late). Please make sure you are able to log in to turnitin.com before then so you don’t have any trouble.
The vocab quiz this week will be on TUESDAY. No IR due this week because we are focusing on Lord of the Flies (speaking of… there will be a reading check on Lord of the Flies on Monday, 1/4 as previously stated).
As you work on revising your Much Ado essay, refer to the rubric below (click to enlarge).
You’ll notice that the rubric has links to tips. For your convenience, that checklist of tips is also copied below.
TIPS FOR ORGANIZATION
- Be sure to include the necessary parts of the classical arrangement (5-part) model: Introduction, Narration, Confirmation, Refutation, and Conclusion.
- Check the transition between your Introduction and Narration. Are you able to make clear the connection between your Introduction and the background information of the text presented in the Narration?
- In the Confirmation section, trace your topic logically through the text. Remember that the Confirmation includes multiple paragraphs that includes evidence (quotes) from the text. Present this evidence in a logical order, which is usually chronological.
- Ideas should build on one another. Test your sentence logic: Choose any sentence and identify its main idea or purpose (what are you trying to say in this sentence?). Now look at the sentences that come before and after. Does the previous sentence lead into that sentence? Does the next sentence develop it further? Do the same thing with your paragraphs: does each paragraph build on the previous? does the next paragraph move the essay forward logically?
- Use transitions between each section and within each section that connect the ideas. Consider transitions words like Furthermore, Later, Next, In addition, Moreover, However, First, Then, etc.
TIPS FOR IDEAS & CONTENT
- Clear thesis statement has all parts (specific topic + debatable view).
- Thesis stated clearly in the Introduction, Narration, or Conclusion.
- If no thesis directly stated in Introduction or Narration, then a focused essay question is posed in the Introduction or Narration (for example, What would drive Claudio to such an action? or What role does honor play in Hero’s life?).
- The best evidence is chosen carefully and then thoroughly explained, clearly showing how the quotation helps to prove the writer’s point.
- Evidence is specific and precise, whether from the text or the writer’s life.
- At least six quoted examples from the text are smoothly integrated using a “quote sandwich” approach that includes the 1) context, 2) quotation w/speaker and citation and 3) significance. See example below. Note that there should be an intro clause (“He scolds,”) before the quotation that identifies the speaker. Also note how the quotation is cited using the Act, Scene, and Line numbers.
After the wedding falls apart and Leonato learns of Hero’s perceived impurity, he lashes out at her. He scolds, “But mine and mine I loved and mine I praised / And mine that I was proud on, mine so much / That I myself was to myself not mine, / Valuing of her, —why, she, O, she is fallen / Into a pit of ink” (4.1.141-145). By repeating the word “mine” over and over again, Leanato shows how much Hero’s loss of honor reflects poorly on him. He may be angry at Hero’s infidelity, but he is even more angry at how her reputation affects his own. Her reputation is as dark as “ink,” to Leonato. Through Leonato’s reaction, we can see how honor is an issue not just for an individual in the Elizabethan era, but for the entire family.
TIPS FOR VOICE
- First-person or second-person pronouns are used selectively and only when necessary to help develop the writer’s ideas.
- Personal experiences include specific, illustrative details that show versus tell.
- Personal experiences are relevant and help to introduce or develop the main ideas.
TIPS FOR WORD CHOICE
- Avoid using overly general or overused words like really, very, normal, bad, good.
- Revise sentences to use strong active verbs, keeping to be verbs (is, was) to a minimum.
- Remove any slang.
TIPS FOR SENTENCE FLUENCY
- Read your essay aloud. If there are places that are difficult to read aloud, then revise the sentences to make them simpler.
- To make overly complicated sentences simpler, identify your main points. Chances are you are trying to include too many ideas into one sentence. Give each idea its own sentence.
- To increase sentence variety, underline the first three words of every sentence. Revise as needed.
- Avoid using “This” or “This quote” or “This shows” to start sentences. Revise by either removing the unnecessary “This” phrase or by replacing “This” with more specific information. See below:
Original: This shows how Claudio feels betrayed by Hero and how effective Don John’s plan for revenge works.
Revised: Claudio feels betrayed by Hero, thus proving how effective Don John’s plan for revenge works.
Revised: Claudio’s words reveal his feelings of betrayal and demonstrate that Don John’s plan for revenge is effective.Page Break
TIPS FOR CONVENTIONS
- Check that your MLA heading is double-spaced and left-aligned with the following components:
- Be sure all titles of the texts are correctly formatted. Titles of longer works―full-length books, novels, plays, newspapers, magazines―are italicized. Titles of shorter works―short stories, poems, articles in newspapers or magazines―get quotation marks.
- Read line-by-line, checking for proper punctuation and capitalization.
- Use present tense verbs when discussing events in the text. See example below:
Claudio felt betrayed by what he thought was Hero’s infidelity.
Claudio feels betrayed by what he thinks is Hero’s infidelity.